Navigating Life’s Unexpected Turns: The Art of Embracing Change

Havilah Malone: 00:00:00

You sabotage yourself, and who's going to know you're going to know, it's not all these external things that you're worried about, or people that you're worried about, or systems that you're worried about, but you need to learn to honor yourself.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:00:16

Welcome, everyone. This is the ReLaunch odcast. And I have to tell you, you are in for a treat. I have got somebody that has truly become a genuine soul sister to me. I saw her in the greenroom and I lit up. It just it made my day to know that I'm going to get to bring her into your world. And why is that? Because hurry launches? And yes, there have been, there have been quite a few we all know, you know, at this point, there's not just one, but they have created so many twists so many turns. And the woman she is today is directly related to the accumulated relaunches that she's gone through. Her name is Havilah Malone. She is a high achiever to say that 10 times right there, she's managed 160 million business for Hewlett Packard. And by the way, she did it by the age of 21. She's appeared in HB O's berry insecure. And for Super Bowl commercials, she is host of the soon to be the executive producer podcast, she empowers female creatives, you might be saying, Hey, wait, am I creative? Yes, you are, she is recognized for her impact. She's received awards, including the now Artist of the Year. She's certified in NLP Silva method, her best selling book, rewriting a new history. And we're gonna go into that as well. She's got this dynamic presence that truly is going to inspire you. And you can, you're going to hear so many different ways that you can get into her world. Because for me, when I met her at the now awards, I immediately you know, you can look through an audience, you can see people, and you're just immediately intrigued and attracted to their energy. Havilah , I am thrilled to introduce you to the relaunch community. Thank

Havilah Malone: 00:02:53

you so much like, wow, it was also it was a similar feeling, seeing you, hearing you being able to meet you in your presence. And knowing this is a powerful, beautiful soul that I can whip. So thank you so much for inviting me into this part of your world. And with those who are listening now. We're here for reason.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:03:18

So we are and I said to you, when we were talking earlier, I said you know, it's interesting when we meet especially at you know, kind of that three HQ level, the head, the heart, the highest self, that highest self, that energetic level that really pulled me towards you. We don't just immediately say I did this, and I did that and and so when I was doing more research on you, I had no idea what a badass businesswoman we were you are getting recognized for, you know, this incredible actress that you are, and you're in Los Angeles and you're just dominating the screens now. But you have you dominated every area. You're one of those you've got, you know that Midas touch, but it wasn't always like that. And there were relaunches along the way and I'd love to hear from you. What is the most significant relaunch that has really put you where you are today made you who you are today?

Havilah Malone: 00:04:25

No, I feel like the most significant relaunch for me was one that literally changed the trajectory of my life. That sounds

Hilary DeCesare: 00:04:33

like a good one. Let's go there.

Havilah Malone: 00:04:38

And that would have been I had been working for Hewlett Packard in the role of a district sales manager and their spokesperson on like the home shopping network and QVC for nearly a decade and after a downturn in the economy there in our entire organization ended up being laid off. And in that because that's a pretty significance, you know, time in somebody's life to have dedicated so many years to a certain path. And then that path being basically pulled from your feet. But it was actually a gift. It was such a gift. Because even though on paper, I had all the things that would have be indicators of success, I would wake up every day depressed, I would wake up every day and have to like put the smile on and go into the world and pull myself into that space. And it wasn't because like, it was a great job. It was great people, like all, all of that was fine. But I had come to a place and I had already heard the call inside, it's time for you to move on. There's more for you to do. And it's not here anymore. But my family was like you've been a leader, good job. I was like, I don't know who I am outside of this, you know, company in this position. And that title had become my identity. And so

Hilary DeCesare: 00:05:58

hold on before you go further. Yeah, that is so important. The title had become your identity. How many people right now are listening. And when you are introduced to someone, you say, Oh, I am, this is what I do. Identity around the business, it is so easy. It is so easy to get there. But you also said something that I find so fascinating that you had that voice telling you. But were you you know that intuition to say you gotta be doing it, but you're like, you are hearing it. But you weren't listening. That's I let me tell you, I've done it too many times myself, I get it. It was

Havilah Malone: 00:06:44

like no, all of these external things are telling you that this is the route that you're supposed to be going, you're experiencing success. So this is where you're supposed to be. But your internal knowing is saying no, like, this isn't. This is one form of success. But I got another form for you that you haven't even touched on yet that I need you to come out of this space and walk with me on this path. And so because I wouldn't take the initiative and do the hard thing, and move on. guy was like, Girl, I got you. I will just take you right from underneath you. And

Hilary DeCesare: 00:07:21

what did that look like? What did that look like? That kind of like it was? No because I You said you know, you had your parents family saying Hey, good job. What are you thinking? You're crazy. And yet, at some point, you're like, it's happening. Yeah,

Havilah Malone: 00:07:37

I mean, we literally it was July, it was in July. And it was a beautiful day. remember it like it was yesterday. It was a beautiful sunshiny day, I was living in New Orleans at the time. And we get an email and the email says that there's gonna be a conference call later on the afternoon. And for for that to come in like that unexpectedly. It was like something was off. Like you could feel it inside like some wire we

Hilary DeCesare: 00:08:03

knew you before you went into that meeting? Yeah, Doomsday has arrived, like

Havilah Malone: 00:08:09

something about this just feels off. And so we get on, like, our entire organization is on this call. And they're basically just like, laying down. Here's what's going on in the economy. Here's what's going on in the business. You all have two weeks. And you know, severance packages or

Hilary DeCesare: 00:08:30

decision has been made the gauntlet is coming down. But what's interesting is that in the home shopping hours in what you were doing, you Was that your first time being an actress and kind of acting and being in front of the camera, or had you done it had you done it earlier or

Havilah Malone: 00:08:52

I had done it for for AMC, I was one of their commentators for a program, which by

Hilary DeCesare: 00:08:57

the way, you've got the greatest voice, love your voice. You really gotta take mine down a couple of notches when I talk to you.

Havilah Malone: 00:09:05

You own what you got. Yeah, and so I had in my original plan I what I even went to school for because I literally changed. Speaking of even relaunches, I changed the trajectory of my schooling and education path, because I originally was going to go to law school to become a lawyer, because I was a part of this junior league program in high school were retry real cases in court. And so we would just argue the sentencing before the judge, and I loved it. I was like, oh my god, like this is this is me. And right when I was about to make my decision of what to study in college, because I started college when I was 16. I was like, I can go and become a lawyer. Or I can just play a lawyer on TV.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:09:52

You played a lawyer, I saw you as a cop. You didn't at all. I'm okay, so let's talk about that. So Oh, after how long did it take you to kind of figure out? Like, what was the path that you took during that time you hear the news? And what goes through your head?

Havilah Malone: 00:10:12

A few things. Oh, first, it was like disbelief of like, Wait, is this really happening? And then it was also a sense of relief, a sense of relief of, okay, I because I wake up every day depressed, and now, I don't have to do that anymore. I don't know what I'm going to do. But I don't have to do that anymore. And so on some unconscious level, there was this feeling of. And so all of of course, like all our teammates, or whatever, like call them like, Oh, my God, like, you know, what, what, what I'm gonna do, and I was, so call, like, oh, you know, everything's fine, it's gonna work out, you know, you'll get another job quick. I'm, like encouraging other people. And I'm gonna say, oh, like.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:11:08

You're like, you're like being the cheerleader for everyone. And you're like, Wait a second. This is actually my life tale.

Havilah Malone: 00:11:18

It was interesting, because I got offered another opportunity to work at a different division of the same company would have had to move mountains, like I would have moved to California then. But I thought to myself, I'm like, I can keep doing the same thing that I know how to do. And I know how to do this, like, I can do this with my eyes closed, but I'm not happy. Or I can figure out what it is that I really want and who I am, and go for that. And I think that that's what this is trying to like, I'm at a fork in the road. And this is trying to give me as an opportunity to make a different choice. And so let me just take a moment because we got a very nice severance package.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:12:01

So let me just how long were you actually at

Havilah Malone: 00:12:03

HP? I was with them for almost a decade. Do you realize

Hilary DeCesare: 00:12:08

as you're sitting here and saying all this, I was at Oracle for almost 10 years? Wow. And I had that kind of the voice inside of me. You know, initially, it was just, you know, kind of lightly talking. Then it started screaming. And I finally left it literally the highest peak of my career, I had just had like, the biggest year of my life. And I'm like, it's time. So there is that inner voice for you? Oh, it was like it was happening. But then things around started to help you decide to move on. So what was the next thing that you moved into?

Havilah Malone: 00:12:47

So the next thing Well, interestingly enough, talking about things that people may not know,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:12:55

I did ask her everyone said, Hey, I have a lot you know, don't give me whatever one you know, you're this famous actress like all this, don't give me what everyone knows about you give me something that like nobody's heard, like, oh, so here it is everybody, listen.

Havilah Malone: 00:13:12

So probably maybe not even one probably two or three weeks into, you know, the layoff and I'm just like, taking it easy, really, at this time. And I get a call. And this gentleman, he would only call me like, maybe once or twice a year, just check on me like, Hey, how are you doing? And he ended up calling me during this time. And so when he asked the Hey, how you doing? And then I shared with him what had just happened? He was like, Oh, wow, he's I'm gonna keep you in my prayers. And you know, everything's gonna be fine. I'm like, yeah, it will be like, I'll figure this out. And then he said, Okay, I then get a text message maybe the next day. And he says, I want to connect you with another friend of mine, who may have an opportunity for you. Like, think, like, make this connection. So I have this call in the friend of his was a director at a funeral home.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:14:09

Not exactly where I thought you were going.

Havilah Malone: 00:14:13

I was like, Wait, so I would go from Miss HP to working at a funeral. Like, that just don't even correlate in my brain, like at all whatsoever. No. And so he was like, You know what, while you're figuring things out, he was like, just considering he said, Just come in and at least just talk to me just have a conversation with me because we're looking for this community outreach director, who would just like be, you know, public facing, just come have a conversation. So I was just like, oh, okay, I can't wait. I'm not doing that. Like I was like, I'm not doing it. I'll come have a conversation. So I go to a meeting. I go to this funeral home Oh, I know. It's like mind blowing. So I go to the funeral home. And when I get there it is him. And then his assistant director, who I meet with. That's why I was there. Because the woman who I met with the assistant director, she was literally a mirror of who I would become in my future. I

Hilary DeCesare: 00:15:25

just got chills. I just got total total chills. I wish she could see the hair on my arms. Yes. Oh, my God. What about her? Like, what was it? It

Havilah Malone: 00:15:37

was her an hour presents her self education because she was very much into personal development. And all of that, even though I didn't even know it at the time until further conversations, and we started to get to know each other. But you could just feel her energy, it was so palpable. And in that meeting with those two, I ended up accepting the job just because I wanted to be around her. No way.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:16:08

That is amazing. I love this. So it was your you often hear me talk, it's all about energy. It is myself. elevate yourself when you are at a high level of energy you attract at a high level of energy. Okay, so this is so good. So, so now, you've gotten this next gig, you're telling your family, here's where I'm going to work?

Havilah Malone: 00:16:33

Yeah, I was like I literally working in a funeral home, you know, if you need, you know, if you don't, here's the pre planning option. It was I lasted there for like two months. Like, I know, it was not for me to be there. It was for me to connect me with her because she took me under her wing. And we started even spending time outside of the job together. And we would dive into personal development books, we would talk about Napoleon Hills thinking Grow Rich, we, you know, started to form. And she had a very similar religious background that I had as well. And so in incorporating that previous, like religious belief with these new spiritual ideas that were being brought in, it was just kind of like, wow, I didn't even know that you could do both. I didn't know that. It could be melded together. But she was a mirror for me of these possibilities. And it was invigorating. And she was the one. We were sitting down one day. And we were like we because we talk about all of these things. Why don't we actually go to an event? Why don't we die? I

Hilary DeCesare: 00:17:37

love that you're bringing this one in? Because I was gonna take you there. Yes. So she was the one who said, Let's go to see Tony Robbins. Well, she

Havilah Malone: 00:17:47

said, because she was very much into like a healthy eating and nutrition. So she was like, What about like, going to a David Wolfe event? And I was like, oh, that sounds amazing. And I was like, Well, I just seem a special that Oprah Winfrey had done, where she and her producers had went to Tony Robbins UPW.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:05

I remember that. Yeah.

Havilah Malone: 00:18:08

On TV, and I was like, she walked on fire. And she had all these breakthroughs. And I was like, I want to do that event one day. And so I told her about it. And she was like, Well, cool. Find out when the next one is, and let's do that. So our Firewalkers

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:21

here. I did it, too. I loved it. And yes, it's real. It's legit. Like it's Biennial.

Havilah Malone: 00:18:27

It's real. We walked on burning coals on fire. And I'll tell you

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:33

how real it is. I was with my dear friend Anne. And a cold got stuck in between her toes and it burned. It literally blistered burned. Like it happens. It's one jet, wondering who like her foot was like, like steaming. I'm like, oh, okay, so you go to this event, you walk on fire? You, you know, at this point, what does that experience do for you?

Havilah Malone: 00:19:03

It opened my world, it opened my mind to all these new possibilities. Because in theory, I knew about a lot of the personal development things and how you can accomplish anything you wanted, but not from a place of being healed and doing those things. And so I was introduced to tools like NLP because that is a neuro linguistic programming is one of the main tools that Tony Robbins uses to be able to help transform people's lives. I was introduced, so I ended up joining his Platinum Partnership, and it's surrounded me with a community of people who thought way bigger than I did, who had experiences that way out, experienced anything that I even knew was possible. And so it it made my world bigger, and then I realized I was bigger. Ah, oh,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:20:00

God, that is so good. So when did you write the book rewriting a new history? When did that come into your world? I've got so many more questions I want to hear about that I want to hear about the acting, I want to hear about everything. But I need to know more about this rewriting a new history,

Havilah Malone: 00:20:20

that book that was my third book. And that came out in 2021. And that actually came and became a relaunch for me as well. And that book came after having experienced a very life shifting Iowa Oscar ceremony. Ah,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:20:42

can you tell us can you share a little bit more for those that don't know about that?

Havilah Malone: 00:20:48

So Iowa Casca is the sacred plant medicine of the Amazon forest, it is the combination of the bark of a tree and then the roots of another tree that is brought together into a brew that is then consumed by drinking it, which gives you a conscious expanding experience. And I WASC is considered the grandmother spirit. And she truly gives you what you need for your journey. So you definitely do set intentions for what you're looking to gain or heal from in that experience. But you get what you need. Even Even

Hilary DeCesare: 00:21:25

if you didn't need it. What did you What did you get from it? What is the you said you set your intention? What did you What did you end up receiving ended?

Havilah Malone: 00:21:35

I wanted to understand the divine design, like why are we here? What is this all about? And, and there was and there were several things, there was like three or four things that I had like set intention for getting understanding and awareness about at that point in my life. And one of the things that came through, so I remember being in in, like, I was under like very deeply in this experience. And I was on this merry go round. And the merry go round, just kept going round and round is beautiful Golden Mirror go round. I was like, wow, this is amazing. Like, I'm on top of the world. And then the miracle round, kept going. And it kept going. And I was like, okay, like, I'm done, like, I'm ready to get off now. And then it was stopped for a moment. And then it was start again. And then it kept going and kept going. And then I was like, okay, like I'm tired of this, like I really, really want to get off. And it was like I could not stop that process from happening. And I think a lot

Hilary DeCesare: 00:22:35

of people this is their life right now. It's not even, you know, this is the merry go round, we're on, no doubt. And

Havilah Malone: 00:22:43

it was like these figures started popping up. And it was like these men and pinstripe suits, and they were like smoking cigars. And it was like they were laughing at me. And I'm just like, I felt like I was being controlled. And I'm just like I am trying to get out of this. And no matter how much I fought, and I got to the point that I was tired. And I finally asked, I was like, Please help me. I asked for help. And I was like, helped me to make this stop. And I remember in that moment, all of that faded away, like in stopped. And images started flooding into my mind of so in preparation for an Ayahuasca ceremony, you have a special diet that you're supposed to eat. And so that diet is to be able to help not only prepare your body, but your mind for that experience. And I had, you know, been like, on it. I was like doing the diet, like to the tee until I was at the airport, about to leave, go, you know, to my WASC experience. And there was a like a breakfast shop or whatever, at the airport. I was like, Man, I really want like a breakfast sandwich. And I was like, I know, it's not a part of the plan. But I'm gonna just go ahead and have it anyway. Because it's this is one thing. It's just

Hilary DeCesare: 00:23:58

how bad could it really be? No.

Havilah Malone: 00:24:03

And so all of that got brought back into my mind in my consciousness. And it was like you sabotage yourself, and who's going to know you're going to No, it's not all these external things that you're worried about, or people that you're worried about, or systems that you're worried about. But you need to learn to honor yourself. I like and the integrity and the commitments that you make to yourself.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:24:31

Literally your words to yourself are the most important words that integrity. Huge. Yes. So So you go through this experience and you realize I've got to write a book without it. I

Havilah Malone: 00:24:44

went through this experience and by the end of it, I received a download. And I literally had woken up, put pen to paper in my hand not stop writing until this message had fully come through. And then I came out. And so I and I knew I was like, this is not just for me, but I'm supposed to share this. But like, Jonah, I was like, not gonna save it to nobody. And so I ran. So for many years, I refuse to like, publicly share in like, my small groups of circles of like, friends and people in these communities of conscious expansion. And, you know, that kind of awareness. Like I shared it freely. But as far as like putting it out there publicly, I was like, No, I'm not doing that. Because I knew to it was going to change my world. And I was like, I don't know if I'm really ready for that, if

Hilary DeCesare: 00:25:46

I'm ready. Yeah. And

Havilah Malone: 00:25:49

it got to the point in, you know, so we go through the pandemic, because I always have any excuses. I'm too busy, like, I'm too busy to write another book. I'm like, I'm too busy to like, you know, put this down on paper and shit, like, I'm too busy. And then the universe got put on pause. And it was like, What's your excuse? Now. You're not too busy, you have time to be able to do this. And I started experiencing pain in my throat, like, literal pain. And I was like, Okay, I knew at this point, because I've had enough experiences and connecting with my body to know that when it's time to do something, and I refuse to do the thing that I am being called to do, then it'll start to show up in different parts of my body or areas of my life. And it's like, no, you don't do 100% assignment. Okay,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:26:38

so I have to ask, because time is time is slipping by so fast. Where does acting come into this? You know, you're, you have so many things you're doing? Is that a passion of yours? Why? Why do you still act? Why are you? Are you? Because you're so good at it? What is it about it that keeps you coming back to it?

Havilah Malone: 00:27:04

Ultimately, I consider myself a highly effective communicator, and I communicate in a multitude of forms. So whether that be books, speaking on stages, whether that be in the creation of a project, or acting and telling a story through them, you know, it's all just communicating information. And I'm able to touch different people in the way that they can receive the message. And that's something I really enjoy doing.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:27:35

So if I were to say to you, who is hafla?

Havilah Malone: 00:27:43

How would you answer that? How will is a spiritual being having a human experience

Hilary DeCesare: 00:27:50

and what is still waiting for you.

Havilah Malone: 00:27:56

More growth, growth of my expansion, expansion of my mindset of my capacity and capabilities. Also, being able to touch more people, like my mission in life, is to be a catalyst for positive change in over 2 billion people's lives. That goal is something that I am still in the process of unfolding. And so that is waiting for me.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:28:26

We have something at relaunch called, it's in the relaunch community called the G Zone. And the G Zone is your growth zone, which I love so much. You know, if you're not growing, you're dying. If your business isn't growing, it's because you're not growing. It's the gratitude. It's the greatness and putting it all together, keeping that as a constant. Keeping that as kind of the North Star always, always thinking about your own personal jeez. And when I say that you talk about growth. How are you growing right now?

Havilah Malone: 00:29:03

I grow my mind on a consistent basis dealing wide. I am always reading and journaling because it's I'm at a point in my life now where I understand the importance of going in. I used to always think that the answers were outside, and they're actually inside. And so learning to trust myself. And it's been a real area of growth because my intuition is very connected. It's very connected to infinite intelligence. And so learning and growing in that capability and capacity to trust it and take action on that is my biggest area of growth right now.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:29:45

I'm raising my hand. I've got my wise woman inside of me, you know, who is still trying to make sure that I'm hearing her you know of what, what is next. So, super excited. did for you and where you are going on your journey? How can people find you get involved in what you're working with?

Havilah Malone: 00:30:09

Yeah, I am on all social media. If you find me at how Allah Malone that's ha VILH m a l o n e, you can also reach out to me via email at ask at hobble. malone.com and I love to hear from people so don't, you know, feel free to reach out?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:30:29

You know what, this has been so much fun to have you on the show. It's been truly an honor to both of us get the honors and be able to meet you know, that's, that's the best part of events like that where you get to, you know, you get to pick a few of the of truly those stars out there that you're just like, Yeah, my North Star, you know, we're going there. We're getting there together. So thank you for being here. Thank you for opening up. Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. And for everyone out there. If you enjoy this, please go over watch you know, listen to some of the other relaunch stories. And if you enjoy it, let us know. Do a shout out five star review whatever you want to say. I read those I get to see them. Let us know what you think of this episode. And again, it's all about Ready Set relaunch. Relaunch is not a one time thing. It is a continuation. It is the relaunch effect of all the relaunches coming together. Until next time, everyone enjoy. Enjoy what you've heard today. Think about putting it in to your world. And we will see you next week again on the relaunch podcast. Take care