Strengthen Your Marketing with This Human-Driven Tactic (Not AI)

Hilary DeCesare: 00:00:00

Hey everyone, Ah, what a day we are going to have. And for those that have always wanted to know, kind of the ins and outs of the world of newspapers, magazines, TV, radio, I've got the woman today that's going to be able to answer so many of those incredibly valuable questions around marketing around how do you put something out there that people are going to resonate with and want to hear more and want to do everything that you're going to be putting out there? Well, today I have an incredible gal. Her name is Sandie Sedgbeer. And Sandie is a professional journalist who cut her teeth in the ultra competitive world of British newspapers and magazine. She has conducted numerous interviews for TV, radio, print media, her subjects span the gamut from show business celebrities, rock stars, authors, scientists, researchers, politicians, thought thinkers, you name it. And guess what? She's going to be in the hot seat. today. She's written six books that have been published, she has been a frequent guest on Britain's most popular TV and radio shows. And she is a firm believer that we cannot separate who we are. From what we do. Sandie combines her love of broadcasting with her pioneering work as a media publishing and marketing consultant. She specializes in advising, advising giving authors, teachers, speakers, individuals, how to apply the science of resonance to build their platforms, profiles, and develop programs and products that people don't just like, but they are crawling all over anything that you are putting out there.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:02:22

You're listening to the ReLaunch podcast and I'm your host Hillary DeCesare, best selling author, speaker and transformational coach widely recognized in the worlds of neuro psychology and business launches, which cultivated the one and only three HQ method, helping midlife women. Yep, that's me to rebuild a life of purpose, possibility and inspiring business ventures. Each week, we'll be diving into the stories that brought upon the most inspirational relaunches while sharing the methods and the secrets that they learned along the way, so that you too, can have not just an ordinary relaunch, but an extraordinary relaunch.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:03:13

Sandie, welcome today to the relaunch, show. And again, as I said, when we were jumping on, I am so excited to hear everything that you are doing in this incredible area. So welcome to the show.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:03:29

Thank you hit me, it's good to be here.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:03:31

Well, here's the thing that I always like to do is for those you know, that are that are just really interested in hearing about your relaunched journeys, how you ended up doing, what you've done, and your relaunch journey around it that's impacted where you are today. So let's start there with sharing that most impactful relaunch journey so far.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:04:02

Wow, where to start?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:04:04

It's a big question. So I mean, I love that you're on the hot seat, because I'm sure you've done this too many people too, right?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:04:11

Absolutely. And then I just sit back and let them do the talking. Well, I you know, I think I've relaunched myself several times throughout my life. And the reason for that is, I don't think anything is beyond us. I don't think anything is out of bounds. You know, it's true, if you can conceive it, if you believe it, then you can create it. And, you know, I set my sights very early in life on what I wanted to do. And that was to be a writer. And and I was probably about four or five. When I told my mother that though I don't know how a four or five year old knows what a writer is. But that's the trajectory I took. And that's what excited me and that's what I became. Then later on. I became an author And then I became somebody who created magazines, conceived new magazines, then I decided I wanted to conquer America, not really conquer it. But I've always had a love affair with America, you know, it's so close to my heart. And when I came to America, I kind of reinvented myself all over again, just just following the things that I enjoyed doing, and serendipity, or call it intention, just dropped into my life, the things that I wanted to do. And so I then started doing internet TV, interviews, for spiritual shows, and completely shifted all the work that I had been doing in resonance marketing in the corporate arena,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:05:50

okay, you're jumping way too fast. Okay, and kind of just, you just threw out 10 Amazing nuggets of information that I'm going to actually ask you to further develop before we go into where you are today, you just like race through the entire show. So let's take a let's take a look back. And you said that, you know, when you were four or five years old, that you immediately knew that you wanted to be a writer, there are a lot of people out there right now CMD, that are trying to reclaim themselves trying to relaunch themselves into their next thing. And they do you? Are you one of those that believes that? Just you know, leave it open and things will come to you? Or as you just said about intention, intentionally putting out there what you want for those listening? Where do you have them start in order to have that success that you've had?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:06:46

You know, I think that we, I believe that we all come in knowing what we're here to do. And we forget that, you know, life makes us forget that we get bombarded by, you know, conditioning from parents and teachers and other people who say, we should look at this, or we shouldn't look at that, but I think our soul knows. And I think that, first of all, anyone wanting to reinvent themselves or relaunch themselves, need needs to go back to the soul. What is it that makes my heart sing, because that is the thing that I think lights us up. That is the thing that we have so much passion for. And most people think they can't turn that into a career, but you can. And I think that when you follow that passion, because you are so excited, your frequency is so high that your intention is naturally there. And and you can create anything you want.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:07:48

So we talk about so we talk about what makes our hearts sing. And I have a framework three HQ. And it's just you know, it's the heart, the head, the higher self, you got to get out of your head tap into your heart in order to reach that higher self and I know that I'm in order to have your heart saying you got to you got to shut out the noise you got to tune out to the distractions. Sometimes that's tough, especially when they're global relaunch is happening personal professional relaunches it, we're being bombarded. And so how do you? How do you listen? How do you listen to your own inner voice?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:08:32

I think you have to go back to your childhood, you know, what was the thing that excited you the most and that you love doing the most? For me, it was, you know, I think over the period of a lifetime, you begin to learn more about yourself, you start off thinking, you know, I thought I was in the business of writing. Actually, I'm not. What I mean is the business of creating and sharing. And I call myself a shameless share. That is the thing that makes me want to write that is the thing that makes me want to do interviews, that is the thing, you know, that is behind the resonance marketing. It's how we share ourselves with the world. And I think that coming back to take away all those labels and the titles journalist, TV host and presenter, et cetera. look at why you're doing that. And then there's the clue right there is what are you about? I'm about sharing, okay, how am I going to share

Hilary DeCesare: 00:09:35

and they love that I love I love you call yourself the shameless share. And how are you going to share? How are you going to what's the vehicle around, being able to do that? One thing that you you said is knowing life makes us you know, knowing yourself knowing this, this you know where you want to go knowing that when you were young, it was a great indication of what you what you thought and what you wanted? And I often I often think about when people are like, oh, you know, I don't really know what I want to do. And I say, you know, we'll go back. Who did you? Who did you want to become at that point? And I was big into Wonder Woman, I mean, oh, my gosh, the bracelets, the you know, the outfit that turning around the the lassoo that, you know, was the invisible. And I always thought, like, you know, for a long time in my teens, like, Okay, what exactly, I'm not going to run around in that outfit. I'm not going to how can I be a Wonder Woman of sort. And then I started as I got older, to go quietly within myself, and understand what did she represent to me when I was a little girl? Right? And so when you and you said that you were, and I love that you've, you've interviewed? How many? How many people have you interviewed at this point? Do you think just roughly,

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:10:56

oh, I don't know 1000s 1000s 1000s upon

Hilary DeCesare: 00:11:00

1000s. And when you talk to people do you have in terms of your your number one question that you always ask them? Is there a go to for you?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:11:16

I always start by asking them to tell me about their journey and what what lit them up, you know, why are they doing what they're doing? What was the inspiration? Because I think we all have, you know, fabulous journeys, every single one of us has a fabulous journey. And I'm really curious to know, what is it that lights people up? What was that moment that turned them from one thing into another? That's usually you know, I love that idea. When I do

Hilary DeCesare: 00:11:44

that with the relaunch, it's the same. And I I really in reading all about your history and everything that you've done. I like the idea that when you understand the relaunch journey is only there even though there are a lot of negative relaunches that happen right the Silver Linings the what did you garner from it? What did you get? You've had a tremendous amount of career relaunches where you've had different areas of the business that you've been able to watch unfold. What do you think now, as we're going into this next wave of media? Where do you think we're going? What do you think is going to be something that people should really kind of take notice and start to lean into in terms of media?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:12:37

Well, I think that the media, you know, we're reading about this all the time, is going through tremendous changes because of artificial intelligence. And there's an awful lot of journalists who are suddenly being made redundant. And I think that's something we have to be very careful about. Because with resonance marketing with resonance, anything, you know, life is about resonance. We know who we like, because we resonate with them, we know who we don't like, because we don't resonate. And I think that's a key thing that we must never lose. If we lose our humanity. You know, if everything becomes dictated by artificial intelligence, then we actually lose our ability to connect to one another. And I think we're at a pivotal moment in our history. And this is something we really need to pay attention to. I mean, you're connecting with the people that like what you do you love what you do want to know what you do and how to do it, and how they can be launched their lives. You imagine if your job was taken over by a piece of artificial intelligence, it might spout your words, it might know what to say. But it doesn't have your frequency, and it doesn't have your heart. And it doesn't have that personal thing that connects us heart to heart. So I think that's a really important thing to people to take on board is that whatever you're doing in the world, be authentic, be you let people share, open your heart and let them share who you are at your core. Because authenticity is going to be such a valuable commodity as we move forward.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:14:18

It's a really amazing, this is this just it hit deep. When you said it's hard to heart. And I'd love to ask you the question of throughout time, you look at advertising, you look at magazines, right used to be all about the tangible magazine in our hand, flipping through the pages. And I remember sitting on a plane and I was next to a mom and her baby like maybe one or two years old. And she handed the I think it was hemisphere, the United magazine to this little this little kid and the kid starts to try to swipe the magazine, right. outdated, outdated. Technology in there, like what the heck is this and almost was getting frustrated, right? Frustrated, the fact that it wouldn't swipe. And I look at, there's always an opportunity for progress. And you look at, you know, many of the jobs that have become obsolete, right advertising is, you know, one that, you know, we don't have the magazines anymore, everything is online, you look at other areas of business that has changed and evolved. And you said something so interesting AI, and where it's come in the last just short to two months, maybe not even two months, we're now I think we're up to version five of it. And it can literally write everything you want, it can write your emails, it can write your lead pages, it can do everything, it can write a reporter's, you know, article on somebody down to the detail. And it's it's making people obsolete. And do you believe that as we move into this next generation, that other professions, we start with reporters, we start with, you know, people in the writing the creative content development space? How will this How will this impact others and other careers and other jobs?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:16:26

I'm very concerned about that, you know, I look at the youth, I have grandchildren who are soon going to be entering the workplace, and you know, what are they going to be doing? You know, how are we going to? And if everybody's out of work, who is going to be the consumer? Nobody's got the money to be able to consume what's coming out? I think this is, you know, I don't know the answer to this. All I know, is, we cannot lose our humanity. We can not lose,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:16:58

that you lose, you know, lose our humanity. I think that if we really focus on that aspect, there's a point. And I have to be honest, you know, I can go in there now. And I was I was using AI this morning to ask a certain question that I wake up in the moment, I'm like, hey, it would be really cool to know, I took Latin for six years. And I started to think about like, okay, what are the key words of Allah that I, you know, have just not remembered in terms of the importance of them in my business, and I'm like, oh, gosh, I really want to, I want to deliver this to people, because it's so impactful. And Latin has been around, you know, something that started the foundation of so many languages. And as I did it, I was getting more and more. And then I started asking more questions and more questions. It's like, you know, 100 times more valuable than just a Google search. And I got caught in the rabbit hole where I kept going, and I kept going, and I kept going. And I found that I'm like, Wait, this is an even bigger distraction than social media. Yes. Right. I mean, and so as you say, Hey, I think we are on a real slippery slope here, that this could end up being one of the biggest, biggest, impactful when we look back in history, this will change the face of media as well, of how we how we look at corresponding and communicating. So when we had to take a quick break, but when we get back, first off with 1000s of interviews under your belt, I want to know what was the best interview ever did. And then yes, everybody, we are going to get into resonance marketing. We are going to hear from the master of how to start to do that with your own clients. So we'll be right back. This episode is brought to you by my very own labor of love my most recent book relaunch. This book is a collection of my stories, other stories and is a motivational guide to living a new three h q lifestyle, sparking your heart to ignite your life. It's available for purchase via Amazon, get ready to try on the three HQ method that I've been using for years throughout my entire life, reaching the next level in all areas, both professionally and personally. Get your copy today at www dot the relaunch book.com Welcome back. I am here with Sandy sedge bear and we are talking about really the relaunches that are happening not just on a personal level, but in the world and we've been discussing AI and the impact that it's having in the media for anything social the fact that it really takes the humanity Get out of the human. And Sandy, as we're talking about AI, as we're talking about the future as this is an absolute global relaunch that's happening, something that's come up in the last two and a half months, I think we can actually put a pin in today's conversation. And by end of year, I bet that when we go back and we listen to this episode, it's going to be one of those, we had no idea how far and wide this was going to spread in terms of what AI is now going to be covering and doing for people on a daily basis. And as you said, the jobs that are going to become obsolete. Yeah. So when you look at that, I know on the break, we started to discuss a little more I said, Hold on, hold on, do not it's too good. I want everyone to hear. You know, what, what further comment would you say around AI as a journalist, as an author of six books? As somebody who interviews 1000s of people?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:21:03

Well, I think the first thing I'll say is that, as humans, you know, one of our major drives is connection, we need to connect with one another. If we don't have that we know we're not healthy, we're not happy. And the danger of AI is it's going to disconnect us. If everybody starts using it, you know, it makes your job easy. I know that. But there is a kind of, you know, I believe that we are all sensitive beings, we all know authenticity when we see it. Why do we know it? How do we know it? It's because there's a frequency exchange. And we know when that is there, even if we can't describe it. And if we start relying on AI, that frequency, isn't there, it isn't there, and people are going to feel the flatness of it, the words may be fantastic. But without the heart behind the words, I think that people will begin gradually to separate from one another, they will read less, they will consume less, because it's not satisfying them in the same way. I mean, everything that I'm talking about today has one basic fundamental foundation. And that is connection, and communicating with one another. Because how we communicate is key to everything. Absolutely everything. So it may seem like we're going off at tangents, but actually, we're not.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:22:28

You know, what I think is so powerful about what you said with communication. And frequency is when you look at energy. And you we know that all emotions have energy, we know our brain waves have an energy, everything around you has energy, which means that it has a vibration and a frequency. I think what you're saying is so impactful for people to hear that when something is generated by a machine artificial intelligence. It doesn't have it's like the chef cooking a meal. And he's distracted and not you're not focused on it. And it comes out different than when the chef is totally 100% focused on putting the love in and really thinking about the ingredients or an author or an a journalist, are you doing one of your 1000s of interviews where you're so excited to be there. And that energy? As you know, we've been talking about resonate, law of resonance elevates the other and you guys come together like tuning forks. Right. Exactly. And I suppose that's such a great point, that it's almost like you have one tuning fork, but the others missing? Yes. So it falls flat, it falls totally flat. So I guess the point would be, if you were to, you know, the people listening out there, what advice would you give them in terms of AI? Make sure as you said, makes your life easier? It gives you heck even writes books now, right? It takes tests it and it does it, you know, very quickly and but what would you say is the what do you suggest to keep the humanity to keep the frequency exchange? If you are determined and you want to use this new technology? How do you use it in a human way? Well, I don't really

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:24:34

know because I don't understand all of the capabilities of artificial intelligence and I try not to use it. You know, I don't think that we're going to be able to avoid it completely. But I think you know, you said at the beginning that one of the things I'm a great believer in is you cannot separate who you are from what you do. And people need to know who you are and what you stand for. You know, because it's that we gravitate towards people that are similar to ourselves, if we are full of heart, and the person we're talking to isn't, there's no connection there. So we must never, ever forget that who you are, you can't separate that from what you're doing. So even if people are going to use artificial intelligence to create their communication packages for them, they need to be really sure that they monitor that. And I would suggest, give it to other people, you know, and ask them, What are you getting from this? Are you feeling, you know, the heart in this? Is this convincing you is this is this resonating with you that word resonance is so important? It's so important. You know, just a quick story, I once was working with an advertising agency, and they were looking at new ways of doing things. And it was a dyed in the wool very old fashioned agency back in the 80s. And they, you know, their clients were all mail order clients, mail order, in magazines, right, not Internet, and coupons, you cut the coupon out, et cetera, and you send off a catalog. And there was a company that created seeds and plants. And so they gardeners love them in bulk from this company. And I said to them, if you take some of that catalog, and you start putting in things that resonate with that person, and their interests, like a planting calendar, like what to do, when this goes wrong, you know, all of those information that they have to go and go to the library or read books, etc, if you start giving them that, watch the loyalty, watch the longevity of your catalogs, and watch, you know, your profits go up, and they didn't believe me. But I persuaded them to try it. And they found out that it worked for them. And all they were doing was actually aligning themselves with the values and the interests of that client, you know, the no longer just supplying the seeds that they want. What they're doing is saying, we value you, we value enough to give you all this information, you know, we want you to know that we are really connecting with you and serving your needs. And that is such a fundamental thing that we cannot lose in society. When I go into a supermarket, and if somebody doesn't speak to you, or if you know, the checkout person starts conversing with you, you make a connection, it's a pleasant experience, and you leave feeling happier.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:27:40

So I'll tell you, a couple days ago, I'm in a store. And the person the salesperson didn't even look at didn't even acknowledge I was there. I mean, I don't care if I had found the greatest thing in there, it did not resonate with me, I felt like I felt like I couldn't get out of the store. It's like when you walk into a room where there's a bunch of people, and you can just feel the energy, right? I just want to turn around and get out of there fast. So is that how you came up with resonance marketing? Is this all an accumulation of everything that you've been through that change of times? Yes. And what can people do to start to put resonance marketing into their daily marketing routines?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:28:30

I think they've got they've got to come from a place of honesty, they can't say something that's patently untrue, or that they don't believe in just because, you know, you're creating a funnel, and you have to do it the cookie cutter way. Um, uh, you know, I do not like cookie cutter at all. It's just speak to people, you know, open your heart and just speak to them, be honest with them. And I think honesty people feel that honesty, they know it, and they appreciate it. I think that you've really got to be very careful about what you say and how you say it. It has to come from the heart, it has to be true. It has to be authentic. You know, I don't like advertising per se anymore. Because it's a distance between you and the person who's reading it. There is no relationship there. But if you create videos, if you create podcasts, if you talk to people face to face, that's an amazing I mean, look at tick tock look at social media, that side of social media. Why is YouTube so popular? Because it's real people sharing something that they're passionate about in most cases. And that's something that is so magnetic. You and I talking here is going to be so much different than if we were writing emails backwards and forwards, right? You know, people can see you they can feel you. They watch your face. They know what's lighting you up. They can feel your excitement, they can feel your enthusiasm. These things are so important. This What makes us human, you know, we all want to be, you know, seen and heard. And that's the most important thing be seen be heard, that's the best way to connect with your customers, anyone you're doing business with be seen be heard, and also be in alignment with their values as well.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:30:21

You know, it's interesting when I think about the most popular, popular however, you're defining popular, but you know, the one that got the most views on social media, was when I literally was saying, a quote, that's out there commonly used and I fast up to say, hey, I don't even really understand it, nor did I, but I now get it. And it was Albert Einstein's, you know, you can't solve a problem at the level of consciousness. And I always was like, What the heck does that really, really mean? And how does that really impact the way we do business? And I was, I was speaking on a stage and I said it and I'm like, Hey, I finally get it. But I didn't get it for a long time. Well, of course, we clicked that. And it became like, the top one, because I was being vulnerable to say, Hey, I never got this. And other people are like, Yeah, I don't understand it either. And it's anytime that I kind of go to that level, and express something that hey, I'm, I don't get this, or I'm not comfortable with this, or this didn't work for me. Or we didn't have, you know, the best success doing that. In fact, it was a bomb, it didn't work, don't try it. Or if you try it, change the steps because I blew it. I think that's when there's that connection, because that's what we're all about. Right? I do believe the act of openly discussing failures and problems that you're going through. And just this morning, I woke up and I have a tendency to wake up with, like, my best ideas of the day are usually like ones that I'm like, Oh, God, I gotta write it down as fast as possible, or I'll forget it. And I woke up. And I thought, you know, it's really interesting. There's been so much conversation with the banking industry crisis and money stories, and how that's really impacting additional fears, and all of us. And I started to think about the glass ceiling. And I thought about the, you know, the fact that women are being paid less than men still. And we've been, you know, on this plight to kind of come on equal levels, you know, we're we're contributing, sometimes even more, and being paid less. And then I started thinking, you know, there's this, this comment that's going around, that says, only 1% of female entrepreneurs hit seven figures. And why is that? Why is that that we keep thinking everything is a struggle, and it's because of what you're saying right now. It's what we've grown up with. It's the communication of what's been told to us. And that's human. As we go forward. We need the voices. We need, the voice is going to say, hey, you know what? That's, that's old stories that are going on in you. The new the energy that's attached with being able to Yeah, if there's one person out there doing seven figures, hey, rate of raising my arm high right now, you can do it to like, Oh, yes. But that's where resonance. That's where, you know, you want to not just be with like minded people, but be with like, energy people.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:33:47

Absolutely.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:33:48

So when you think about, you've interviewed, so many people, 1000s of people. What question right now, if you were interviewing yourself, would you ask? Oh, that's

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:34:03

a good one. I think I think that question about what turns on your light. That is such a fundamental one, because people don't often think about that in themselves. They're so busy looking at, you know, what they've got to do to succeed, et cetera, to live but what turns on your life because the minute you say that to someone, they smile, you know, something lights up inside them. And I'm, I'm a great believer in, you know, doing everything you do from that place, that place of passion. Because again, it's down to frequency, you smile, your energy changes, your physiology changes, everything changes. You're putting that out and people around, you are more eager, you know, they're more eager to hear more from you. So think what turns on your light is just a brilliant question to ask people. That's got to be the one when you go into a party, although some people may feel it's a bit intrusive if you don't know Um, you know, what is it that you love to do the most?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:35:05

I like to say what fires you up? What fires you up? What like, because I think we're so dulled out these days with all the stress that we forget, we tune out instead of tuning in. Yeah, yeah. And so what is right? What is the one thing right now that truly lights you up? And I know you care? I know, you're gonna say grandkids can't say grandkids?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:35:31

No, no, I will. I will say my no BS spiritual book club. That's the thing that really makes me smile. Because it's useful. I'm having so much more fun with it than I ever thought I would best interviews I've ever done. Because I don't have to do anything. I just listen. And it seems to make the people that I'm interviewing really happy because somebody is connecting with them and asking them a personal question about their own life that they don't normally get in interviews. So it's, it's like a gift that keeps on giving. So yeah, that's,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:36:09

I had I had the pleasure of being on there with you. And I have to say, you, you have such a great way of bringing out in people what lights them up? Why do you like that? Why is that book the one that you're really you know, and I remember you said on one of them, you know, I've never, I've never heard of that book. And I wanted to throw one in just to kind of, you know, fuel the fire, and see where we went. And I thought I, you know, I got off that. And I was like, That was so good. You are a master at that. Okay, well, we do have to take a quick break. And when we come back, I have mentioned that you have written six books. And I would like to go into one of your books, and I want to talk about all of them. But sex lies and love how to understand the opposite sex. When we come back, we're going to jump in to that. This episode is brought to you by my very own labor of love my most recent book relaunch. This book is a collection of my stories, other stories and is a motivational guide to living a new three h q lifestyle, sparking your heart to ignite your life. It's available for purchase via Amazon, get ready to turn on the three HQ method that I've been using for years, throughout my entire life, reaching the next level in all areas, both professionally, and personally. Get your copy today at www dot the relaunch book.com. We are back and I am with Sandy sedge beer, and we are talking about what it really means when you are in your element. When you're in your passion. When you are doing what resonates out there and you're pulling in people, you're pulling in that communication to allow people to be vulnerable, for you to be vulnerable. But I did ask before we took a break, I wanted to you know, she's written six books, I need to talk at least about one and that would be sex lies and love how to understand the opposite sex. And first, why did you write

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:38:28

this? Good, good question. I had written a book called sexual power, what is it, who's got it and how to succeed in love and life, and everybody. And it was really about charisma, what is that thing that gives somebody charisma, and in there just for fun, I had two chapters. And one of them was called what men want from women, and what women think they want, and vice versa. And wherever I went on television, everybody kept asking about those two chapters. So my publisher said, here's another book. So I decided I was going to write a book on, you know, what men want from women and what women want for men, and how to understand each other. And so I did that book, my publisher, you know, commissioned it, I did that book. And it didn't quite make it into America, because John Gray came out with men are from Mars, Women are from Venus at the same time. But it did do very well in Europe and other countries. But basically, again, we're back to communication, you know, because without communication, we make up our own stories. You know, if we, if there's a blank there, we're going to make a story about it. And this, this is what's happened through the millennia, with men and women, where we have completely do not understand and we have all of these ideas of why the other one does what they do. Whoo. And it just drives us crazy. So I decided to write that book. And ultimately, really, it's all about we have to learn to understand one another. And in order to do that, we have to have communication and be open.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:40:16

And my I would even throw in stop assuming, you know, rice for so long. I just was like, you know, it's the principle of the Golden Rule Do unto others as you would want done to you, and doesn't work. Especially when it has to deal with man, right? So I gotta go back to something you said. And that was about charisma. And what, what is that thing? What would you say?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:40:46

I tell you what it is. I mean, I studied everything. I looked at pheromones, I looked at voice, you know, the sound of a voice, what is it that, you know, gives that person I tell you what it is, in a nutshell, confidence. It's confidence. That's the thing, and everybody thinks, everybody's got confidence, but me. And in fact, you know, confidence is built upon the experience of success. So you have to put yourself out there have a few successes to build a confidence. but confidence is the most seductive and attractive thing in the world. Yeah. And that's why everybody then says, that person's got charisma. No, they're just exuding confidence.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:41:31

And it's interesting, I find working with female entrepreneurs, that when I dig deep enough, it's that we've got the imposter syndrome, we, you know, it's a lack of confidence. And so, you know, what do we package up and put the bow on? Bringing you that that period of the mindset of a confident executive, a confident entrepreneur? That is so good. I had never, I've never heard it said like that. And that was so powerful. So let me ask you, I always think this is such a powerful question of what really is your why, why get up in the morning? Why are you really doing all of these things that you're doing?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:42:15

I think it's because I'm so curious about everything. That, you know, it's the why not? Is my why, I think, because people have said to me many times throughout my life, you shouldn't be doing that. You can't do that you're not equipped to do that you're not qualified to do that. And my answer is, why not? I think it's pushing those boundaries. And you know, taking a step, just because you want to see whether you can do it or not. Yeah, that's my, that's my why the why not?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:42:46

And I really think you're passionate in regards to women and empowering them to say, why not? Because again, it goes back to your book, it's the confidence, it's the ability, because we've been taught since we were young, that things have to be challenging, right?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:43:04

We don't know what we're capable of until we try until we do that, well, why not? Let's give it a go. You know, let's see how it works out. And what's the worst that can happen? You know, you may have a failure, but it's not going to kill you. So you will learn something, and then you'll do your next why not?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:43:21

You know, my mom before she passed, she had a great saying, she would say it is what to tis Hillary Jane. So now what is right, it's like, enough already. If we're back in the, you know, How challenging is something going to be how tough is it you know, who's done that and I love you know, the the mile when that, you know, person broke the mile record. And as soon as it was broken very shortly after it was broken again. And that's, that's such a powerful part of this. And so as we look at women, and where we're going and I really think it's an incredible world we live in right now because there's so much support amongst us that we're really trying to elevate other women and give the power of you know, like the Lynn Taggart wrote the book, The Power of eight right this energetic and I know, spiritually you're, you know, you have really found this what caused you to find that level of higher self?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:44:29

You know, I don't know the answer to that. I think I've always been seeking answers and I do remember a period when it kind of went from something I was evaluating to something I truly believed and I don't know what that was, but I think I think if if you remain curious if you just keep looking, keep investigating, you know, keep learning as the most important thing, and keep trying things, especially trying experimenting with things then you You can't help but get to a point of self understanding. And I think everything is within us, we've got it all. We just need to have the confidence that we have it on, we can use it on.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:45:15

Well, when you're interviewing people, you have such a level of confidence. And sometimes confidence comes with having done something 1000s of times what Interviewer What person has really surprised you the most was like, wow, that was profound to me.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:45:35

They've been a few along the way, it's really hard to say, but someone who comes to mind is Matthew Fox. And are you familiar with Matthew's work? Yes, about that man. I mean, he got excommunicated by the Pope. Because he was had such progressive ideas about women. That was one of the reasons. And he just went and got himself, you know, joined a different kind of church. He's just done so much, because he believes why not? You know, I mean, he's had so many great ideas that were stamped on, he was shut up for many years, before he was excommunicated. He wasn't allowed to write anything. But he just kept going. He just felt so passionate about what he thought was possible, and what should happen. And he did it. And, you know, we owe so much to that man. So

Hilary DeCesare: 00:46:29

for the people that are listening, and they're feeling like they're stuck, or overwhelmed or underwhelmed, what do you think is the first step to getting to that position of, I can do it, I can get there, I can make it happen.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:46:46

I think one of the most important things is to talk to someone else. Because we don't see ourselves, it's very easy to get caught into something and think, oh, no, I can't do this. But when we talk to others, none of us ever say to other people, because, you know, we don't tell me what you see in me. You know, we're not good at seeing ourselves. But if we, if we have somebody else who can say, Oh, but I see this and I see that and you go really, you know, this is what we need to hear. I mean, I do this thing called Clarity, coaching. And it never fails. People don't know what they've got inside them, until they ask someone else to tell them what they see.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:47:29

That is so true. So you are always the person who asked you know what, what books do you love to read? And what's on? You know what's on your list? I'd love to ask you what is your favorite book and why?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:47:42

I have several favorites. I'm always being asked to do my 10 best, I can't have several, several books, but I love simplicity. And I love the things that make me go. So true. What I think of that, you know, the things you can live by. So the Four Agreements, the five agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz, I love Dan Millman, his work, you know, the way of the Peaceful Warrior, because everything he says is so practical, you know, it's just dirt when you when you read it, and it really brings you back to the things that are important, and how you can move through life. So those kinds of books are the ones that really, really interests me the most, and that I want to recommend to others, because we're all looking for our, you know, map to get through life had we had we do this, none of us, you know, have a blueprint, we have to create it. And I think knowing some of those fundamental, foundational things about how life works. I mean, the Four Agreements, you know, be in your word, do not take things personally. I mean, it's just, you know, it's a guidebook to live life by

Hilary DeCesare: 00:48:53

I read it, I read it every year, and I teach, I teach one of my courses just around it. Like, how are you doing that in your business? Each one of them? How are you doing it in your life? Yeah, I think it is so important. And I think that, as you said, simple is profound. Yes. It's like we overcomplicate everything. So I do want to ask you, what is next for you? What's your what's your next big relaunch? That you're?

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:49:24

I don't really know, I'm still very focused on the no BS, spiritual book club. And what you know, the possibilities there because I think it has so many possibilities. So that's kind of like my, my big thing at the moment is just really taking that up to another level where you know, it's free and it should be free, but it has to be monetized at some point. So getting it to the next level so that it continue to grow and be a resource for people. Because I think that's what we want more than anything is resources. We need visa horses that are going to help us through life and especially the time that we live in in now, because it's going to be very easy to get so sidetracked by the AI by the technology by all the media, all of the chaos out there. I think we've just got to keep coming back to that fundamental part of a humanity. So true.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:50:22

So how can people get in touch with you be part of your world and all that you just inject people with this like confidence themselves? I just find when I'm talking to you, I'm like, Yeah, I can do it. I got more clarity on this call.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:50:38

Well, they can go to my website, which is my last name sedge, beer.com, sed GB e r.com. They can learn about, you know, what I do, how I work, the different things, the no BS spiritual book club is also there. So you know, they can have habit that and look at look at your 10 Best list and look at you know, Don Miguel Ruiz Jr's 10, best list and all kinds of things and find inspiration. You know, I think the best thing we can do in life is be an inspiration for others.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:51:11

So great. And also I have my 10 best on that, as well. And I took a lot of time, I went back and I reread some of them just to make sure that they were the ones that really resonated, I took some I put some crazy ones in there, as you know. And so Sandie, thank you so much for being here with us. And again, we will have all of the ways to get in contact with Sandie in our show notes. And I also want to ask you, as the listeners out there, something resonated. Come on over to the Instagram, the relaunch cow and let us know, what was your big takeaway. And if you want to hear more of segments like this, make sure that you're subscribing make sure that you are following us make sure that you know that we are here to bring people like Sandie to you to really help share these invaluable messages of building your confidence today, resonance marketing, how you can continue to be human, and what's becoming an unhuman world. So Sandie thank you again and everyone. We will see you again next week. Until then, live now. Love now relaunch now. Take care.

Sandie Sedgbeer: 00:52:34

Thank you, Hilary.