Relaunching Your Life with Intention and Resilience

Hilary DeCesare: 00:00:00

Hey, everyone, and welcome to the ReLaunch Podcast. And again, I have to say, I am delivering the goods. And when you are finished with this show, you are going to walk away with some of the most impactful tips on how to really have the life that you really love living, how good does that sound? And of course, I'm not bringing in someone who's just like, ho hum, I'm bringing the goods, I'm bringing in the person that is going to electrify this show. And when you are done, I want you to spend time, go visit her site, go get involved in her world. Yeah, she's that good. And who am I talking about? I'm talking about Miss Diane Forster. She is a 2022 top TV host and mindset coach and 2021 America's mindset coach. I mean, this is like, right up my alley. This is my jam, everyone. Diane helps women over 40 reinvent their lives, personally and professionally. Her TV show signature speeches, books, courses, and coaching. They all produce rapid results for women. Yes, you're going to hear all of what you need to do. And again, these are for women that feel stuck. And then we can begin to heal the limiting beliefs that hold us all back and step into each and every one of our personal power creating happier abundance fulfillment in every single area of your life. Her clients call her the Miracle Queen and the Dream Come True Maker. I mean, can you now know why I love this. Diane Forrester is the founder of I have Today TV network, the first and only women's personal development and transformation network. And again, this is for women just like us Gen X.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:02:27

You're listening to the ReLaunch Podcast and I'm your host Hilary DeCesare, best selling author, speaker and transformational coach widely recognized in the worlds of neuro psychology and business launches, which cultivated the one and only three HQ method helping midlife women Yep, that's me to rebuild a life of purpose, possibility and inspiring business ventures. Each week, we'll be diving into the stories that brought upon the most inspirational relaunches while sharing the methods and the secrets that they learned along the way, so that you too can have not just an ordinary relaunch, but an extraordinary relaunch.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:03:17

Diane, welcome drumroll. Welcome to the show. I am like literally buzzing.

Diane Forster: 00:03:25

So am I Hillary, I was so honored to have you on my show. And I'm so grateful to be here with you again, are you know, we are soul sisters as excited to spend this time with you and inspire and empower your audience today. So yeah, let's go.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:03:43

Oh, here's what I always like to do for those that I know, surprisingly, may not know you, but they will know you. Well. At the end. I always like to talk about the impactful relaunch that literally shaped who you are today. So can we start there? And then we'll go into all of this other incredibly magic stuff that you do. Oh,

Diane Forster: 00:04:03

of course, of course. Well, you know, we all have our journeys, and I certainly had mine. I grew up in New York and then moved to California when I was 17 and went to San Diego State and then I got a job in advertising and worked in the ad industry for eight years up in LA and then I moved to Chicago to get married and switched over to the television side, the industry and I spent 20 of those years at ABC. Now what was going on in my life. So while all of that was great, career was great and amazing. I had, you know, in a snapshot, what you would call a habit, our life I was married, I had the kids I had the dogs we had the home we had the cars we had the travel, you know we I had it all, but I was in a very toxic, narcissistic, unhappy marriage and relationship and it's A secret I kept hidden from everybody. I didn't want anyone to know how truly unhappy I was. And I struggled and I stayed and in and out of therapy for 20 years, Hillary like way, way, way too long is

Hilary DeCesare: 00:05:16

it's so incredible what you just said, because, again, on the outside, looked awesome. Everyone was you know, it was an enviable, enviable position. But on the inside, and I get it, I get it outside, look over, everything looked great. Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, want to be like them. And then they didn't know what the inside was until.

Diane Forster: 00:05:39

Because the the questions I kept asking myself is, this is everything I wanted. Why, why? Me? I'm not happy. So that

Hilary DeCesare: 00:05:49

whole what's wrong with me? That statement is just it just hits near and dear to me. It's like, why am I not happy? Like there must be something wrong. So then you end you have this, you know, awesome job and your personal professional, right? Things seem really great. But

Diane Forster: 00:06:10

so in June of 2011, my kids were tweens. It was a regular Saturday, we were busy running around to and from sporting events and practices and running errands. And it was June 25. And it was a Saturday night it was the kickoff of summer and we're at some friends house having a barbecue and all the kids are running around in the yard and the Sangria is flowing in and the grill is going and we're having a great time. And we get in the car to go home. And the fighting started. And I got home Hillary and I just snapped. It was like the breaking point for me. So I went up in the bathroom, I locked the door. And I had two full bottles of prescription pain medication sitting in a drawer from a surgery I had the year before to remove part of my colon. The stress of my life was literally eating me alive. I mean, it was killing me. And my mother died of colon cancer at the age of 53. And I was headed straight down that path. Oh, she's totally here right now.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:07:13

And can I tell you and you know, my mom died of colon cancer as well. And then she died. If she died three years ago, we lost her within 14 months. It was just the worst. But I've talked about that. But I'm right now completely. I've got like the chills from my head to my toes. Thinking about your journey and thinking about the pressure. And I often say it's like a pressure cooker. Right? It's coming in on us. And we just it's like, where do I go that self implosion that is happening, right? So you're in this bathroom, you've shut the door and you are looking at those bottles.

Diane Forster: 00:07:53

No. And now I dumped the pills in my hand. And I'm waiting. And force came, knocked might like karate chop my arm and the pills went to the floor. And a boy screamed in my ear, Diane, you are not ending your life this way. You need to go get help. So you can tell your story and you can help others. And it was the first time in my life. I heard spirit that loud Snowden and was my mother totally my mother,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:08:20

I was gonna say it must have been your mom like,

Diane Forster: 00:08:22

was my mother because she's she's so prevalent. And I just threw my hands up. And I said, Well, you need to show me the way. So I cleaned up the mess dried my tears went out and kiss my kids Good night. And the next day, I called a therapist and said, I need help on changing my life. And so that started my journey of beginning to dig deeper into it. How am I going to get out of this life? What's going to happen? How am I going to survive? You know, all the fears, all of that all the logistics? How are the kids going to do all of that. And then in thanksgiving weekend, I found out that he had been having an affair. And that was the catalyst that kicked my button gear because I went from fear to anger. And that's what I needed. It was the kick in the pants. And so I took all that anger and it moved me into action and so we ended up splitting up in in January got through the holidays and that really started my spiritual awakening my personal I just

Hilary DeCesare: 00:09:27

gotta say this right now. I split up with my husband in January as well. And it's just so crazy. You're You're everything that you're saying I'm like Okay, wow. And other people listening right now. I want to go back to that moment where you really connected to you know, I call it three HQ the head, the heart, the highest self and the highest self is when the wise woman, your intuition really kicks in. And there was a force in that room because you Were you were at your lowest you were open, you were like literally crushed, you know, crushed under the pressure of it all that your hands just emptied out the pills. They just, you know, when you think back on that moment, was there any way any doubt in your mind? What? Like, I should do this? I shouldn't do that like, or was it just like at that moment? That was

Diane Forster: 00:10:29

it was instantaneously. Oh, that moment I was I was done. I was not in my right mind anymore. I just really wasn't I was at the brink. And I know this happens. The the number one age group for suicide attempts are women between the ages of 45 and 64. We can go into that either later or another time. But to talk about it, I was just one of those statistics in that moment. It wasn't premeditated, I hadn't thought about it before. But I just hit that point. But as soon as that whole transaction happened that, you know, the chopping of the arm and the voice, I immediately knew no, there's there's enough, there's got to be another way, there's got to be another way. So and

Hilary DeCesare: 00:11:10

I want to say in addition to that loneliness, prescription drugs has never been higher in our age group, Gen X women and beyond. And so for anyone listening, you know, whether you have this moment like you did, Diane, or whether you're just like, you know what this is, this is what she had experienced in the bathroom. This is now your calling card to go make something happen for yourself. Call that doctor, call the therapist call, you know, just get it done somebody. So thank you for walking through all of that. At that point. You now January have decided I'm done. You heard that he had an affair. You're moving forward. You've got kids or what age at this point? 14. Okay, so you've got you've got 14 Are they twins? Yep. Okay, seriously? You know, I have twins here. Yes, I do. No, I didn't know that. I had forgotten that part of it. Okay, so the twins are 14. And you're like, how what was going on in your head at that point? In terms of like, where you were what you were thinking? Take me back. So

Diane Forster: 00:12:27

when it first happened, I had a brief pity party for myself. You know, why me why this, you know, all of that. And I had already started my meditation practice and journaling practice. And it was delved just so deep into everything. I was reading every book attending every seminar webinars, I guess, the works. And my intuitive gifts were getting really lit up and my ability to really see, hear and know and feel all of the Claire's were happening to me. So I was guided to do an I forgive you chant. Instead of my regular meditation, I heard her say, you need to sit down and say I forgive you. So I did that for 20 minutes, sat there on the couch, close my eyes, the tears were streaming down my face. It was up until that point in my life, the most cathartic experience I ever had was just releasing everything. And I stood up from that and went, oh my god, I did this. I did this live. Well, I want an extraordinary life. No more of this and I'm going to do everything I can to get it. And so I started you know healing and you know, the creation of the Spectre hack was happening so it was Facebook for people

Hilary DeCesare: 00:13:39

who don't know what the Spectre is. Again, this got you on like home shopping network. UVC QVC I know it was one of them. Okay, so QVC Yes, you may have seen Miss Diane before. But tell us what those was and how this came about.

Diane Forster: 00:13:58

Well, I was you know I love to cook and bake and entertain and I was really into all of that stuff and and I was making deviled eggs one holiday and I went to put that paprika that final finishing touch on my beautifully decorated deviled eggs on their tray and too much spice came out of the container and it ruined the dish in one second. And I instantly saw on my mind and I heard Oh God What if there was this sifting spoon I had a tiny little sifting bowl and a long handle you could just stick it in the jar the spice bag and then had a tapping edge where you just tap it wherever you wanted. You know no mess no ways how cool would that be? Now my sisters call me diagonal because I'm I am that

Hilary DeCesare: 00:14:43

you guys have to check it out actually because I have I am ordering it because I must say I do think is pretty cool. I'm not a big bite. People are going to be laughing. Why is Hillary getting it? Well, I'm not a big chef in the kitchen but I love to bake you have,

Diane Forster: 00:15:00

oh, it's great Decker finishing tool. So I set out on this quest to find this thing I saw in my mind, and I couldn't find it. And that voice told me, you need to create this. So I went through the process of developing a product, I didn't know what I was doing and, and then the producers at ABC called me one day and said, Hey, we're doing a local inventor segment. And we hear you're an inventor. And I was like, I'm not gonna inventor I just, all I have is a prototype. And they said, We don't care. You know, we want to feature local inventors at all stages. So I went on there for one minute, I got hundreds and hundreds of orders for a product I didn't even have I that's led to me winning an Innovation Award at the International housewares show, which led to QVC being they're coming over to my booth saying we want to sell your product on our website. So they started placing orders with me. And then they said it's selling so well, we want to have you on air. So I went on air, we sold out in six minutes. And so I had this experience going on in my life at the same time I was going through this transformation in my personal relationship, and I thought, you know, things were coming together. And I was like, Well, I can't create that. What else could I create? So in August of 2013, two years after the bathroom moment, I had been writing and journaling so much. I woke up with a poem in my head called I have today. And I wrote it down as fast as I could I get goosebumps when I say it. And when I finished writing it of the many of the things that I had written, I looked down and I said, this is way more than a poem. So this movement, I'm supposed to help other women who don't know their self worth discover their true divinity, power and purpose. Because if I was living like this, how many of the millions of women are living? Yes, I'll play.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:16:51

So I think this is resonating with everybody listening.

Diane Forster: 00:16:55

Yes. And so the Holy Spirit showed me what it was. And it was this big multimedia, global company with all these divisions. And, you know, and I was like, so much. And I said, I think I'm going to start with writing a book. I'll start there. And so it started to come to me, I knew, I knew I wanted to write a book, I knew I wanted to speak I knew I wanted to coaching knew I had a story to tell. And so through everything that I was taking in from everybody else, amazing teachers living in gone. I started to develop my own processes that worked for me, I was like, this is all amazing information, like your process, right? But what's going to work for me that's going to keep me intentional, aligned and empowered. Like, like, what is what are those things going to do? That keeps me

Hilary DeCesare: 00:17:46

and let's keep it simple, because there's way too many things out there that are way too complex.

Diane Forster: 00:17:51

I'm all about simplicity. I'm all about three steps. I'm all about that. If you can't remember it instantaneously, then it's too much work. You're not going to have to

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:01

so I have to ask you got a three step intentional living process. Can you go through it?

Diane Forster: 00:18:06

Yes. It's called love it, thank it, bring it.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:11

Love it, think it bring it home. Good.

Diane Forster: 00:18:14

Thank you love it and get thing. Bring it,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:18:18

bring it, bring it in. So bring it now three steps.

Diane Forster: 00:18:21

Totally easy. Love it is about love your life. No matter what you've been through. It's all been there as a gift. It's been there to teach you. It's helped you decide what you do want worse versus what you don't want. It's giving you wisdom and clarity and experience. And so you and you have a life that I mean the fact that you you have had a life and you're here right now, you just gotta love it and embrace it. That's your past. Dank it is about the present moment and being in gratitude and appreciation for everything you have right now. From the bed you get to sleep in to the cup of coffee to the shower, to the clothes on your back. Everything even though you want more. Be grateful for what you have right now be grateful that you have this moment. It's why our company is called I have today. Ring it is about

Hilary DeCesare: 00:19:15

your before you go on with that. I love that you're saying you know the gratitude, being thankful of what you have today. That's the secret to getting more that is the secret to your own incredible growth. So it's I love that you're saying that include that in that today. Thankful knowing that you want more, it's great, but by being thankful for what you have today, that's how you get what you want in the future. So good. Okay, and then bring it bring it as the power

Diane Forster: 00:19:43

that is you intentionally creating your future that is deliberate and that takes awareness that takes visualization that takes desire that takes removing doubt, and replay lacing it with determination. Like you really get to have anything and everything that you want in this life. And the only thing that separates us, from here to where what we want is the level of doubt in between. That's the only thing. When you resonate with, I'm certain self

Hilary DeCesare: 00:20:17

doubt, self doubt brings, I mean that syncs all ships,

Diane Forster: 00:20:21

all ships, I have six words, you need to remove from your vocabulary. And that is one of one of the six words like, you just just get rid of doubt. You don't need it. It's it's not serving you why? Why doubt? You know, if you've got an idea of vision, you've when you've received that you have received that, okay, that is yours that came into your awareness for you. It's already done in the quantum field. So when you get that you go, Oh, wow. Like I got the vision for I have today how big it is. I didn't, I didn't dismiss it. I just parked it over here and said, Well, I'm going to start with this thing. And so over time, yes, of course, it's been evolving. And it's always been evolving in divine timing. I've always thought blue, when spirit has said, Now,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:21:13

okay, I have to I am like smiling from ear to ear for those that are watching this. Because, you know, I think I even mentioned to you, my big dream is to be a co host with Jota copy, like, I want to do a whole relaunch show with her. So you know, that's a big dream. So I have I parked it out there. It's out there. You know, the universe knows that. That's what I want. And I gotta tell you, I am continually so grateful when all these little teeny breadcrumbs start happening. And I'm like, oh, yeah, you're getting me closer. But you got to be, as you said, you got to be thankful for what I have today. You don't have her. She's not mad. She's not there yet, but she will be. And you mentioned six words. And I've only heard one. Can you give us the others as well?

Diane Forster: 00:22:00

I can. But I just want to interject something for you. Okay, because you said something really important. How do you know that's a big dream? Is being a co host with Hoda, really big dream? No, of course you are, you

Hilary DeCesare: 00:22:16

know, here, if you're listening, it's not it's just meant to be. And she made

Diane Forster: 00:22:22

me I'm not saying anything about it. But for you. When when you say big dream, you're now putting it out there. And yes, of course, it's going to happen in divine timing for you, honey, but here's when it will happen. As soon as you align with it. And you are ready for the onslaught of fame, fortune and so much abundance that's coming to you from that one appearance. And

Hilary DeCesare: 00:22:45

I tell you, I think what you just said is one of the I have interviewed I think now upwards of 200 people. I've never thought of it that way that is so profound to me that you know, I call it skeezy goals scary and crazy goals your year out. But I also say okay, what is the big dream? The one big thing you really want? And you're right. Why am I saying big when don't put it on a pedestal. I love that. Okay, so the six words so far, we go,

Diane Forster: 00:23:21

you ready, and I think you get the words to replace them with. So I'm gonna fire through this. But you'll notice the first word is worry. You never need to say worry again. Think of all the things that you worry about in your life that don't happen. When you're giving your energy to worry, you're actually inviting it and don't do that. You don't need that. You replace your worry with wonder. I wonder if it's all gonna work out. Oh, my God, you're gonna be okay. I wonder if this is gonna be the best day of my life. I wonder if it gets better and better. Z's change the energy that way. The second one is doubt with determination. Love that instead of doubting I am determined. I am determines you're going to move in much more inspired action with determination. The third one is fear with faith.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:24:15

I use that one all the time. I love it. Yeah,

Diane Forster: 00:24:18

fear is a natural emotion when it comes up. Don't run away from it. Just acknowledge it when it's there and just go, alright, I can feel this fear right now. But I also am operating in faith.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:24:29

Because I also love I love the fear aspect of if you really think about what fear is, it's something that hasn't happened yet. It's in the future. Right? So that is so great to sit there and say okay, but the faith is that not a big dream. The faith is that it will happen. i This is so good. Okay, so we've got worry to wander doubt to determination, fear to faith, trepidation.

Diane Forster: 00:24:53

Trust. Yeah. When you're in trepidation you are doing a dance, you're leaning into something that you want, but Then you're stepping back, your heart is saying yes, but your head is saying no. And you're doing this dance in and out, instead of just trusting that the net will be there, the opportunities will be there. When a door closes, another one opens, it's if you just trust that the universe is totally guiding you to the fastest path that's right for you. Let go the wheel and allow it to happen. What else do we have here? Anxiety? Yeah. With anticipation? Ooh, so guide. Because you know what anxiety is? It's anticipation in disguise, I think actually is like, when you don't know. And you're going into the unknown, which all of us do. If you're trying anything new that you've never done before, you're you're, you're going to call you're going to co host with Jota you that thing is going to happen. And so there's a little bit of anxiety, like, and I handle that like it, you know, but instead like anxiously, I mean, anticipate that just see the whole thing.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:26:01

Right word anticipation is so good. It is so yummy. It is just like, oh, so good. Okay, and the last one

Diane Forster: 00:26:12

is stress. With surrender. And surrender is my favorite word in the world surrender, when we're pushing up against something we are going against the natural laws of the universe. When you chase a dog, it runs, right. When you chase money, it runs when you chase, you know, a person to date. They run, when you just surrender a allow, and we have you literal we receive because we've got this, you know, electromagnetic toroidal field of energy around us, we're way more than the physical body, right? So when you just relax into that, and stay in the higher frequencies and vibrations of emotions and feelings. It's already in the quantum field, it's coming to you. Things just come to you. I mean, I can't tell you the stuff that gets handed to me. Like people will go, are you kidding me? And it's just being able to just surrender, I surrender it. I, I want to take

Hilary DeCesare: 00:27:14

out the barrier. When you take out the barrier and you're just open, you're open to whatever is going to come in knowing as you said, it's going to be perfectly divinely timed. Right. So good. There's also I have to say, as you gave those six, which are so powerful, we will have them in the show notes. There's also those words that we say throughout the day, as you said, Hillary stopped saying big. It's not stop saying I can't I shouldn't I you know, I won't all these words that are limiting that puts you into scarcity. Think about all the words you use throughout the day. Think about the conversations you have with people. And are you the gossip, Mel, are you putting out the negative energy, because if everything is going to come back to you, we want to make sure that everything we're saying everything we're thinking like you just said is is for our best, our best self our best direction. So good. Okay. I can't even believe how fast this this time went. But I do want to ask you. So what are you working on right now, as this future, you know, unfolds? Things have shifted. And so what what is the big excitement factor going into this next year for you?

Diane Forster: 00:28:38

Well, thank you for asking. Well, first, let me tell you what I believe I believe that women can change the world. And I believe that we need to change the statistic, the suicide attempt rates, the depression, anxiety that are women in their 40s 50s 60s. And I love everyone, by the way, I love men, I love children, all of that. But I know what a powerful force, this segment of the population is. And so what they have is so much talent, but they're scared and they're going through transitions in their lives, major transitions, as powerful as they did when they were young. And in their teens. As we transition through empty nesters, maybe divorce going through menopause, career changes, aging parents, all the things that are happening to us in this group. So my show is as you know, I have today and it's the art of intentional living and I really you know this I focus on really bringing instant actionable things that you can do in your life right now to start changing your life today and doesn't cost anything to do it. It just creates awareness. I call it ABCs awareness begets change. Once you're aware, then you can start to change. Well in that big vision that I got in 2013. I knew what was coming and I want to take that message that work into the world in a much better Your way, my goal is to touch the lives of a billion women. And I can't do it alone. So what's exciting is I am helping women launch and start in their own TV show. So I'm taking my 40 years in advertising and television to help them create a unique, brilliant TV show that's authentic to them, reaches their right audience, they can leverage it, they can monetize it, it's an asset in their business. So with all the changes going on in Hollywood, and, and all the opportunities right now, there has never been a better time. You need your own platform, if you're going to stand out, you need your own platform. So that's what I'm helping women do. And the goal is to get their shows out there. And then next year, early next year, I'm launching my own TV network. So yeah,

Hilary DeCesare: 00:30:51

is that huge? Yes. Okay, so Diane, where can people find you? How can they find out more about all of these exciting things you're working on?

Diane Forster: 00:30:59

Well, I would say on social media, Diane Forster official, is the best way to find me on social media. You can also go to my website, I am forster.com and subscribe to my newsletter, you can, you know, email me there if you want to learn more about the TV hosting and the other, you know, products and services, because I have a lot of mindset work that I do as well. But yeah, I would say those are those are the two plus best places to go. Yeah. And I

Hilary DeCesare: 00:31:28

as we talked before the show even started, we've got some things that we're going to be collaborating on in 2020. For that I am beyond excited. And so last but not least, I used to do a part of the ending where and especially with you it's so great to bring it back right now. What is a product that we're you know, we're soul sisters, we're girlfriends here that you absolutely say Hillary, you need this product. What would that be? And you can't say it's the sifter. I already know. That's really good.

Diane Forster: 00:32:00

No, no, I'm gonna go oh my god. Is this any product or a beauty product? What?

Hilary DeCesare: 00:32:05

What any product? Any product you want beauty or it could be something else?

Diane Forster: 00:32:10

Why? I will tell you. It just popped into my head. So this is the one I need to say. It's lumify. eyedrops.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:32:17

I love them. I have about four of those in my upstairs. Yes, it is great. Why do you love it?

Diane Forster: 00:32:25

Because I get dry eyes. I'm in front of lights and cameras all the time. And so that works instantly. It makes your eyes so white and bright and it moisturizes them. I absolutely love

Hilary DeCesare: 00:32:38

him. It is so good. I have to say I use it multiple times two and it takes I've got like a vein going through. And it literally doesn't get rid of it. But it helps a heck of a lot. Well listen, Diane, it was an absolute like just love fest today. I loved having you was so great. We will have everything in the shownotes. And for everyone listening, right it is about live now. Love now, relaunch. Now use these tips. Use these words, use the three things that we talked about in terms of love. Thank bring it. And definitely connect with Diane. And as you're relaunching now go out into the world and make things happen. Do not wait. And we will be back here next week. And I'm looking forward to having you here again. Let us know you love this episode. Make sure you're subscribing. Leave us a comment. I love to read what you say about our shows. Take care of everyone. And I'll see you next week.

Hilary DeCesare: 00:33:49

You've just heard another episode of the ReLaunch podcast. If something shared in this episode resonated with you. Please head over to iTunes right now and leave us a five star review and share this episode with others to inspire them to take the small steps that lead to a life full of purpose and possibility. And remember, you can have immediate access to the shownotes and any giveaways at therelaunchco.com/podcast until next week, now is your time to relaunch your transition into a transformation