How to Build a Better Version of You

Are some of your beliefs and habits holding you back from a better version of yourself?

It took CEO Development Strategist Kelly Ruta decades to find her way to her best self. A trained psychotherapist, Kelly spent over 20 years in her field – a result of her own childhood trauma and subsequent mental health issues. But her call to help others didn’t feel complete. Many of her clients needed a coach, not a therapist. Today, she helps business executives grow their careers in a healthy and productive way.

Kelly has 4 simple tips that can help you, too, discover a better version of you:

1. Don’t Skip Ahead

To start, it can be tempting to try and rush on to the next thing in an effort to find your better self. For example, once you decide to look for a new job, the uncertainty may lead you to take the first offer that comes your way. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. Our culture tells us to skip over the journey and focus solely on the arrival.

Resist the urge to miss the journey – don’t skip ahead.

This may mean setting up multiple interviews, attending networking events, and reaching out to a mentor for advice before taking your next job. After all, the journey is where you discover who you are and where you’re meant to be going.

2. Ask the Right Questions

When you’re in the midst of changing things for the better, be sure you have the right mindset. Suppose it’s time to end your current relationship. Although it’s never easy, don’t spend time playing the if/then game. You know the one – If I hadn’t chosen them/stayed so long/been through this, then….

Learn to ask yourself the right questions.

Regardless of your current situation, be it a broken relationship, a struggling career, or a lifestyle change, take time to ask – What did that experience unlock in me to allow me to be the person I am today?

When you do so, you’ll develop the right mindset to move ahead.

3. Be Seen

We all have a deep need to be seen and to belong. This is because belonging assists in our survival and has done so since the beginning of humanity. Revealing your true self is healing, motivating, and necessary for success.

Don’t be afraid to be seen by your circle.

Think about the people who help encourage you, who spur you on during the pivotal moments of your life. They are invaluable in your quest for a better you.

4. Embrace the Mess

‘Think positive thoughts’ seems to be a catch phrase these days when it comes to finding success. But focusing only on the positive glosses over what it takes to get you there in the first place. In order to build a life or a career or a relationship that’s meaningful you need the ups and downs.

That’s why it’s important to embrace the mess.

Both your successes and your failures are what help get you to the right place. If you don’t feel the muck and the mess – if you don’t go through it – you won’t develop the skills to build resilience and fortitude.

With the right steps, you can begin to build a better, strong version of you. And from there, the sky’s the limit.